| What Engineers SAY: |
What Engineers MEAN:
|
| Major Technological Breakthrough |
Back to the drawing board. |
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| Developed after years of
intensive research! |
It was discovered by accident. |
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| Project slightly behind original
schedule due to unforeseen
difficulties. |
We are working on something
else. |
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| The designs are well within
allowable limits. |
We just made it, stretching a
point or two. |
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| Customer satisfaction is
believed assured. |
We are so far behind schedule
that the customer was happy to get anything at all. |
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| Close project coordination |
We should have asked someone
else; or, let's spread the responsibility for this. |
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|
| The design will be finalized in
the next reporting period. |
We haven't started this job yet,
but we've got to say something. |
| |
|
| A number of different approaches
are being tried. |
We don't know where we're going,
but we're moving. |
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|
| Test results were extremely
gratifying. |
It works, and are we surprised! |
| |
|
| Extensive effort is being
applied on a fresh
approach to the problem. |
We just hired three new guys;
we'll let them kick it around for a while. |
| |
|
| Preliminary operational tests
are inconclusive. |
The darn thing blew up when we
threw the switch. |
| |
|
| The entire concept will have to
be abandoned. |
The only guy who understood the
thing quit. |
| |
|
| Modifications are underway to
correct certain minor difficulties. |
We threw the whole thing out and
are starting from scratch. |
| |
|
| Essentially complete. |
Half done. |
| |
|
| We predict... |
We hope to God! |
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|
| Drawing release is lagging. |
Not a single drawing exists. |
| |
|
| Risk is high, but acceptable. |
100 to 1 odds, or with 10 times
the budget and 10 times the manpower, we may have
a 50/50 chance. |
| |
|
| Serious, but not insurmountable,
problems. |
It will take a miracle. God
should be the program manager. |
| |
|
| Not well defined. |
Nobody's thought about it. |
| |
|
| Requires further analysis and
management attention. |
Totally out of control. |
|
Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter
|
Eskimo Pi |
|
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2000 pounds of Chinese soup |
Won ton |
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1 millionth of a mouthwash |
1 microscope |
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Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement
|
1 bananosecond |
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Weight an evangelist carries with God
|
1 billigram |
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Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour
|
Knot-furlong |
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365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling
|
1 lite year |
|
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16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone |
1 Rod Serling |
|
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Half of a large intestine |
1 semicolon |
|
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1000 aches |
1 megahurtz |
|
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Basic unit of laryngitis |
1 hoarsepower |
|
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Shortest distance between two jokes |
A straight line (think about it for a moment)
|
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453.6 graham crackers |
1 pound cake |
|
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1 million-million microphones |
1 megaphone |
|
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1 million bicycles |
2 megacycles |
|
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365.25 days |
1 unicycle |
|
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2000 mockingbirds |
2 kilomockingbirds (work on it....) |
|
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10 cards |
1 decacards |
|
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1 kilogram of falling figs |
1 Fig Newton |
|
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1000 grams of wet socks |
1 literhosen |
|
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1 millionth of a fish |
1 microfiche |
|
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1 trillion pins |
1 terrapin |
|
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10 rations |
1 decoration |
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100 rations |
1 C-ration |
|
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2 monograms |
1 diagram |
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8 nickels |
2 paradigms |
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2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital
|
1 I.V. League |
